pockets full of dust.

it's a terrible feeling to owe a debt. i have bills piling up and up... my company has delayed my paycheck it's been a week so far... I have 30 bucks to my name. and only empty promises of a paycheck. i took my state license test yesterday, wont find out for 6 weeks if i passed, would be shocked if i did... although i really wish i could lie in bed and wake when this is all over, life goes on.

i think it's funny, how when things go wrong, that's when i turn to God. i'm a very unfaithful friend. it reminds me of a scripture that says it's hard for a rich man to get into heaven. i think i finally understand. when i have money, i feel self sufficient and content with life. when i'm broke i feel so in need of God, not to bail me out, but to sit with me and comfort me through the process. and he always does. and i feel better than when i had lots of money.

So yesterday, a good friend of mine and i set about being friends with God again. We started a process that provides aguidline to get you through the bible in 90 days. I have to read every single day, and i'm actually excited about this! I need God as my friend, and why should he be mine, if i'm not his. I miss Him.